Turkey Advantage

   I've decided to take full advantage of my proximity to the Turkey Trot which takes place Nov. 17. My intention is to know every dip in the road and every pot hole (and there are many in this water-based town). The route basically ends yards from my doorstep. Ten years ago, the last leg would go past my house.

     As you can see, quite a bit of the route is by water, whether it be the inlet, creek or lake. The problem is at 5:30am it is very difficult to appreciate it in the pitch blackness. 

     I'm getting a little bored. I hate to admit it since my father says a bored person is a boring person. I have time so I can micromanage this run and perhaps cut a a few seconds off my time.  As you can tell I have lots of time on my hands. Some day I'll get a life or a life will get me.

     I've been up and down with my running progress. I've been accused of slacking off which is probably accurate. 5 miles was really tough yesterday and left me achy in the legs.  I think this is what they mean by hitting the wall. The tubby tummy is coming back. I have to remember where I came from and that this is what separates the men from the boys - maintaining. Taking it off is actually quite easy; as you see progress you develop momentum. Keeping it off is hellish but I have an advantage. I've been down this road once before and I refuse to go down it again, my dad's craving for tirimisu be damned.

     So I will look at this map and try to run the course at least twice a week and skirt in and out of it the rest of the time. Most importantly, I will not let the turkeys get me down.

The Runner-up

         This post has hardly anything to do with running. Well, that's probably untrue - in my life everything has to do with running. The more I improve my body, the more my mind improves and that's enough for me. It is something I can hold onto when all else fails. And these fall mornings are gorgeous for pounding the pavement.
         This fall I am getting that promising feeling as if something is going to change for me in a big way. It's been a fun summer without any casualties, to my shocked relief.  I am cautiously optimistic which is something I haven't truly felt since I began this blog in January 2010.
         I have said it here before and I will say it again. I am not a competitive person by nature (Words with Friends notwithstanding). I don't have the aggressive component needed for coming in first. But almost three years ago I was in a situation where I did come in as the runner-up, leaving me with an all consuming heartache that remains unmatched. I've gauged recent disappointments by this, saying, "are you half as heartbroken as you were then?" The answer is, inevitiably, "no." To which the reply is, "OK then, shut up and move on."
         People say you can't run away from your problems but when the problem is not yours and you are still haunted by it, the best thing to do is to put your sneakers on and run.

 

After "happily ever after"

   Nobody ever talks about what happens after "happily ever after." In films, it always ends with the couple kissing or a wedding ceremony or a fade to black with hopes of good things to come. Rarely do you see the inevitable roller coaster after that dramatic fadeout. What happens is, little by little, Cinderella gains a couple of kilos. Now the question is what is she going to do about it? She's gotta change things up a bit, obviously. Happiness comes with a price. You start to go out more, going to restaurants...AHA! There's the root of it. Now here's the question: is she going to compromise her personal happiness because of the strides she's made which have actually led her to this moment? That's a very firm "no." But let's face it: munching on an entire bag of mini rice cakes is no help in the matter.
   The setback of a wounded knee does not exactly do any good either. Don't let people fool you: in exercising, there is hardly any greater high than running, if you can bring yourself to do it. Biking, not really. Walking, too time consuming (half the distance in twice the time - funny you only realize this when you start to run). Swimming, extremely inviting but as of yet, untried.
   So the question keeps popping up in this and a few other aspects of my life: what are you going to do about it? What I'm going to do is make myself happy and stop being lazy. I'm going to get back to work in a week and cut out the crap. I'm going to bite another bullet and run the 10k Hill and Dale Run (yes, that is the actual name). It is the "Hill" part which frightens me. I've driven over part of the route but haven't had the nerve to try it with my sneakers. Flat road is one thing, hills are entirely different.  One thing is for certain. I shall not be Cinderella at the end of the ball: one shoe on, hitching a ride back to the start line.  Time to man up and put the rice cakes away. Why is it a constant battle?

P.S. If you want a look at what happens after the whole "boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy marries girl" routine, watch the Audrey Hepburn movie "Two for the Road." After happily ever after, with a side of vitriol.

The Half Marathon

     "Wow! This is worse than the Garden State Parkway in the summertime."
                                - a man at the start of the Long Branch Half Marathon


   
     The most hilarious thing about it was the designated start areas being referred to as "corrals," like we were a bunch of cows. I think that speaks for itself. There were pacers at every 30 seconds, runners with flags telling you that you are running at 10:00 per mile. You don't realize how emotionally comforting it is until that 8th mile when you realize you are still doing alright even though it doesn't feel that way. And forget about the bathroom thing. You keep thinking the next port -a- potty is going to be your last, especially when the pounding on the pavement takes its terrible toll on your bladder.
      In the 11th mile, my left knee gave out on me. Ironically, it was the right one which worried me the previous evening. One of the marathon officials came up to me and asked me if I was ok. I told her my issue and that I was going to walk a bit. She said I gave her the chance to actually do her job and informed me there were only 2 turns left before the finish line and the rest of the route is along the water. I walked for 2 blocks and then was able to slowly jog across the finish line. Needless to say I was one of many limping to my car. In fact I thought I was going to fall over in the Monmouth Racetrack parking lot as my left leg seized up with no one to pick me up.
      If anyone has looked at my former posts they know that I was never the girl most likely to do this. 13.1 miles. That's alot of "putting one foot in front of the other". I don't know whether it was luck. The conditions were perfect: 45 degrees, completely overcast. My head was clear of everything, good or bad. Maybe that was it - keeping a clear head.
     There is only one important thing I need to remember from my Half Marathon experience. If I can do that, what can't I do? Well, let's find out.
     Incidently, 13.1 miles in 2:32 chip time., 95 lbs, 8 skirt sizes. There's nothing you can't do.

Lucky 13

So it's the night before. I'm nervous. Am I prepared? As in grade school,  the answer is, if the conditions are good and luck shines on me, perhaps. Have I prepared enough? No.  I've run as far as 8.5 miles. It's not 13 but I expect it will be enough to get me through. I will desperately be looking for that 2nd wind. But one way or another I will finish because for me, finishing this race would be special and I really and truly need something special right now. I don't know how special it makes me - I am one of at least 15,000, not to mention the nutters doing the full 26.2.

Since I have to be up at about [insert deep breath] 4:30 am, I am getting myself together ahead of time: putting my 2 1/2 hrs worth of tunes together, shorts, shirt. Travel light. Ipod and car keys and that's it. Unfortunately there will be no one at the other end to cheer me on or hand me a sweatshirt but that's the way the cookie crumbles. Sometimes you're on your own. No baggage, travel light.

But more important than any of that is the question why run a 1/2 marathon? In order to answer that I will leave you with a quote from a real underdog movie:

 
"'Cause all I want to do is go the distance... and If I can go that distance, you see, if that bell rings              
and I'm still standing, I'm gonna know for the first time in my life, you see, that I weren't just            another  bum from the neighborhood..."

                                                                            from the motion picture "Rocky"

Listen to the Music

Need the tunes baby! Kicks up the natural rhythm. - my freshman sister


   You can talk about speed and rhythm in running, but what's really important is the music. That's not to say it can't be done without it. It takes all the discipline you can muster and I am proud to say I eked out 3 miles of discipline last week. I doubt you'll see that happen again. Well, let me digress even further.
   Music means different things to different people. For some, it's the rewind button on life, bringing back memories of experiences, good and bad. For others it's music, entertainment; neither here nor there in the grand scheme of things. For some it evokes such an emotional response filled with empathy as to render the listener practically breathless. Alright, can you tell I feel very strongly about music? Music and movies, but we won't go there.
   So, flashbacks aside, music does motivate you. It helps you, to use the vernacular, "move that ass."  The trick is to pick songs that help you move and in that, timing is everything. 
   So rather than getting all reminiscent, musing about the past, let's talk playlists. The Fool's Run is next Saturday, so I need 35 minutes of top notch music to get my ass moving.  Let's take a look at the old Nano playlists, shall we? Oh wow...as I look at this, I realize I have some bizarre and, shall we say, eclectic playlists...


Don't you feel it growing, day by day
People getting ready for the news
Some are happy, some are sad
Whoa, gotta let the music play...
                          -Doobie Brothers




1. Beethoven's symphony # 7 (from the soundtrack "The King's Speech")  - as it happens, this starts off slow and keeps building up and up so that by the end of it when you are really hauling some ass, you've slowly been warmed up and you haven't even realized it. What can I say, it works for me.
2. I'm Gonna Live til i Die/Frank Sinatra - the sentiment and the tempo is there. 
3. Oh Happy Day/The Edwin Hawkins Singers - this crossover spiritual does it for me every time. You can definitely see my peaks and valleys during this song. Every refrain my speed jumps.
4.  It's Amazing/Jem - More for the positive sentiment than the tempo. Good thoughts.
5. The Ballad of John and Yoko/Beatles - again speed. "the way things are goin' they're gonna crucify me"
6.  Empire State of Mind/ Jay-z w/Alicia Keyes - any New York song is bound to make you feel good or is that just me goin' back to my roots? "the City that never sleeps better slip you an ambien"
7.  La Grange/ZZ Top - Nothing gets me moving like the guitar in this song. 
8   Going the DIstance (from the motion picture soundtrack "Rocky") - don't ask me why, but a few weeks ago, at the end of 7 miles, this song came on and so help me, I grew wings. I can't explain it. Who knows if I'll get that back but it worked then, so it can work again.

Point of No Return

"Ah, well you're screwed now. You paid your money. Now you've gotta run it, you nut."
                                                          - my best friend about 4 hours ago

Yep. I just paid out what to me is a small fortune to run in the Long Branch Half Marathon.  I'm not sure what hurts more: the $95 fee, the 6:50am start time or my legs after the 6 miles today.

I'm starting to realize that I am running out of time to work my way up to that grueling 13 mile mark. I have to admit 6 wasn't too bad, not at the time. Now that the day is over and I've stopped moving, I've gotten a little wobbly.

There are moments when I say, "What was I thinking?' Even my father commented, "13 miles...do you think you really should?"  I do. I really think I should. We all have something we need to prove and this is the only way I can think of to prove that I can accomplish great things until I write the great American novel. We all have something lacking in our lives and I think this is my way of trying to fill that void.

Maybe I am crazy, maybe I will blow my knees out, or maybe I should take my car and drive the 13.1 miles.


Past the point of no return
The final threshold
The bridge is crossed so stand and watch it burn
We've passed the point of no return...
                        -The Phantom of the Opera

Something's Gotta Give

STRETCH!   I've received this advice from everyone - teachers, friends, would-be lovers. I know it's all kindly meant but I never can seem to find the time. I've been told 10 minutes for every mile you run. 40 minutes is not a feasible option. 25 is pushing it.  If I get in 10 minutes overall, I'm doing well.

And so, as ever, karma is a bitch - I popped my knee 2 weeks ago at the start of my run to Sea Girt. (Warning: Endorphins are very dangerous, natural pain killers. Sometimes you don't realize you have a problem until it's all over.) As a result I'm a little behind in my mileage build up. 13 miles in 3 months. Current mileage:  4-5

So what do you do when you fall down? You pick yourself up, dust yourself off and start over again. 4 days a week instead of 7 days. 5 mph instead of 6. 4 miles a day instead of 6.

Let me tell you, and anyone who knows me can say this: determination has never been one of my strong suits. I go the way the wind blows and the prevailing wind happens to be from Long Branch, NJ this upcoming May. And if something's gotta give, this time it will be my knees before it's me.


When an irresistible force such as you
Meets an old immovable object like me
You can bet just as sure as you live
Something's gotta give
Something's gotta give
Something's gotta give

                       - from the motion picture "Daddy Long Legs"

The Twinkie Defense

I was just reminded of the Hostess' chapter 11 announcement so I had to weigh in, naturally and no pun intended.  I'll tell you a little story.

  A 12 yr old girl lived in a neighborhood in one of the boroughs of New York City. It was the kind of area that had a small town quality to it. Most everyone knew everyone else. The girl played on porches and the front stoops of apartment buildings. She shopped on the long strip of stores that started at the top of a hill and went all the way down to a park where, in the snow, she would bring her red Flexible Flyer sled to whoosh down one of the sweetest little slopes she had ever experienced.
   Everyday she would walk out of school with her friend, past the church down the street to the apartment building with the white columns that faced the rectory of the church. She would use her latch key, go inside, drop her books in the empty apartment and promptly turn around to go to the corner candy store called Optimo, named for the sign brandishing the make of cigar sold in the shop. There she would buy 2 packages of Twinkies, 3 Reeses Peanut Butter Cups, a Whatchamacallit bar and a pint of chocolate milk each and every weekday afternoon. She would proceed back to her house where she would eat her newly purchased stash along with a mayonaise sandwich while watching General Hospital and The Edge of Night.  The outside world was not being particularly kind to her so she took her comfort in enormous quantities of junk food.
   Through no fault of her family, this went on for years.  Her parents were working hard. There was no one to tell her to stop or talk to her about it and so it went on, chocolate milk and and Twinkies...
In Providence, Rhode Island, the girl began to understand the benefits of a good walk in between Chipwich ice cream sandwiches. In Chiyoda, Japan, she understood the benefits of a good mountain climb. In London England she understood the benefits of a good run whilst looking the "wrong" way to cross the street. She still had a weakness for hazlenut chocolate and chocolate milk.
   She came very close to climbing the weight loss mountain but fell off just as she was coming to the peak.  It took 10 years for her to dig herself out of that hole.
   Now here's the upshot.  As this girl continues to peak (and she has not peaked yet), Hostess, the company which houses Twinkies, is on a rather dramatic financial spiral. They were in trouble the moment they lost their biggest and most consistent customer.

"Dan White's lawyers argued that his diet of junk food led to a chemical imbalance which led to the killings [of Supervisor Harvey Milk and Mayor George Moscone]. The press coined it "The Twinkie Defense."
                    from the motion picture "Milk"

Not all who Wander are Lost

"You went all the way to Kyoto, Beaumont, and London but you found yourself on a Manasquan boardwalk."- my best friend on a recent birthday card

It's true. I've been to a few places, always with the motivation to find...something - happiness, peace of mind, contentment. It's a difficult prospect especially when it's a wild goose chase. You won't find any of it elsewhere until you find it within yourself. I know it's so cliched but it's true - you can never escape what's going on in your own head.

Losing what amounts to the weight of an average 12 year old is of course helpful. I have to admit. I love shocking people who haven't seen me in a few years. The reaction is priceless and the result is very easy on the fragile ego. But here's my point: there's got to be something more. And until I find it I'm gonna try going to the next crazy place without really going that far.

BANG! What you just heard was me throwing down the gauntlet. Ok it's after midnight on Sunday January 8, 2012. As of this moment I am in training for the New Jersey Half Marathon which takes place on Sunday, May 6, 2012. If my meager technological skills permit, I will log my mileage here. We'll see. I think I can do it on Nike.com. In the meantime I will, to use the expression from Led Zepplin, ramble on.

"All that is gold does not glitter, not all those who wander are lost; the old that is strong does not wither, deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, a light from the shadows shall spring; renewed shall be blade that was broken, the crownless again shall be king." - J. R. R. Tolkien